Project 365

Well, today, I have been scoping for jobs online. Made a few emails and got some hopeful answers. It is so hard to find work lately. Even the overqualified jobs are hard to get. Oh well, I will keep trying.
The weekend went by way too fast. I had playoffs with my pool team and we made it all the way to Sunday night. It takes up all your time, but it was fun. I think I had like 4 whole hours with awake time with the hubs though. My son seen me a little more, but this next weekend is full blown family time with the Superbowl coming Sunday. We are going out to a friends house to celebrate and watch the game. My 13 year old is a major Steelers fan and so am I. Being in the same room with him that day will be awesome!!!

So my daughter went mudding on 4wheelers this past weekend. As they were going down trails the ran into a branch sticking out and it cut and blackened her eye! It looks horrible and I feel bad for her. I checked to make sure she didn't need stitches and I feel like it could have taken one or two, but being as stubborn as her mother, she didnt go. I am so thankful it didnt get into her beautiful eye though. Thank God! It really sucks!

Beautiful Day in Louisiana!

I have been down all week with the crud! Still not feeling 100% yet, but I'm trying! Got out of the house for a couple of hours today to get some fresh air and so glad I did. It is 70 degrees today with no clouds in sight, so I went down to the River for a 2 and a half mile walk/jog. Took some pictures with my phone at this wonderful day that God gave us. I did alot of thinking and praying as I was out alone and just closing my eyes and taken in the fresh air did wonders.

These rocks are beautiful in real time. Hubby and I used to sit on them late at night just to talk and rekindle things between us. Yes, we have wonderful memories on these rocks, thank you very much. ;)

The sky and water blended so beautifully here. This picture doesn't capture how it really looked. I need to get my camrea working again so I can get justifiable pics.

This is what happens to southerners when we pass 69 degrees. No matter what month it is here... we take full advantage of it quick, before cold, rainy, nasty weather comes back to the forecast.

The pavilion I was under after my run, makes me wish I lived on the water. This is where I would be 24/7 if I did.
Just a great day to capture all the surroundings we all take for granted, just a mile from my house. I think I will start bringing my writing material with me, the next time I get out.

So excited!

I know this is probably nothing to everybody, but to me it was just what I needed after a pretty boring lame day. My husband came home from work this evening and asked me if I had talked our friend about my involvement with her design work. I told him that all she was waiting for was business cards from me. He asked how much they would cost. I told him the cheapest I have ever run across and dealt with before, was with Vistaprints online. He told me to look it up. I designed my cards and for 500, they were only 10 bucks! No shipping and No tax! He ordered them for me. He told me he believed in me and wanted me to go for it! I didn't act excited about it, but after realizing it over the evening, I am so happy that I am doing this. They will be here in a couple of weeks!
In the meantime, I am doing my research and adding my name to list upon list of freelance writing work and I recieve emails daily on event planning. I'm stepping up to the plate with all of this.. and it's going to be a ride!! Keep me in your prayers, as depression likes to sneak up on me these days, but I know that God has His hands in it all!! I love him so much!

Project 365

So, I am really sucking big time trying to get in each day something on my blog for my Project 365. Sorry about that, I will try and do better. Not much really to talk about other than me trying to get more information about becoming an event planner. Lots of information to take in right now, but I am going for it. I talked to a really good friend of mine the other day that is an Interior Designer and she asked me to get some business cards together for her. She is meeting new clients and getting her name out and wants mine out there too. So when I get the chance, I have to get some ordered for me and for her. I will eventually be working part time with her, and I couldn't be more happy that she wants to include me in her work.

I have requested a new sewing machine for my birthday in March, so I can start making pillows. I love pillows and love making them in all different shapes in sizes. I want to give them away as gifts along with using them with my design work. I want to eventually sale them at craft shows in the near future. It is something my daughter will be helping me with, so along with creating, we can have some real quality time together also. I cannot wait until everything that I have planned comes together once and for all.

What a wonderful last few days

I haven't had a chance to blog in the last few days and it's funny how I feel when I don't get the chance to. I walk around feeling like I haven't completed my day. It's funny to me now since blogging has never been apart of my day. :)
I sure have learned alot about myself since Friday. Things that got tough because I wasn't honest in a certain area to my family. Once I decided to get honest, it was tough and alot of things like running came through my mind. But this time, I just stood there and took it and believe it or not, it helped in the end. I had put myself under so much stress last week, that it started affecting my health. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat. I had the fake smile and the discontentment in my soul. I started reading the Word and realized how fake I was in this area. How I was literally destroying myself and my marriage. I realized that I need to love the me I am when nobody is looking. I realized, once again, that God see's all, all the time. Now, don't get me wrong, I wasn't out doing wrong things, I just wasn't being honest to my husband and to me that is just as wrong as cheating. Doing anything behind your spouse's back that can hurt them just from trusting you, can destroy the trust you have worked so hard to build. Thankfully, I found out how much that man really loves me, because that situation was an easy way out and he stood there and held me anyway. He was there for me over the weekend when he had no reason other to be there.

I guess my point to all this sharing is, whatever you do in your life, at the end of the day, if you can't look at yourself in the mirror and love what and who you are for that very moment, somthing needs to change, and that change is nobody but YOU.
I thank God for teaching me, even at the age that I am, each day who He is, and how trusting Him is the easiest thing to do when you take out all other equations.

Thinking of a NEW direction...

Not to replace my writing at all! But I have been researching something quite interesting to me and I am thinking seriously about getting into it. I am looking at becoming an event planner for weddings, birthdays, anniversaries, bar-mitzvah's, etc. A friend of mine talked to me about it and she thought I would be the perfect candidate to make it a career. One, I love to decorate and I love to host parties already and am known to my friends on some pretty awesome parties. I love people, and I love to make them happy.... so.. I am looking at everything I can get my hands on to go for it!

I will still blog and write, as that is my passion, no fear of leaving it. I just really want to become my own boss and do a major career change, and I think this just might be it!! I will keep you posted on my process as I go along.. but until then.. I am going to start getting my name out there for potential clients for my future.  Any help would be greatly appreciated! I'm so excited about this idea and I am going to do my very best at it!

Project 365

I know that I have posted already today, but since I missed yesterday, I figured I needed an extra one for today. :)
So I am in dire need of a new hair style. I like mine but it is so dead at the ends, it keeps breaking off and getting shorter. I used to keep my layers cut, but let them grow out and the last two times I went for a trim, I asked the stylest to leave them long. Anyway, as soon as I get the chance, I will probably go ahead and get a long hair style. I don't know, we shall see.
I found this cute picture on my daughters IPOD the other day and asked her to send it to me. I wanted to share it here with you.. for a good laugh. It's only funny because of how true it really is. After all, isn't that why we think most sayings or jokes are funny, because we can relate??

So tomorrow is finally Friday, if that really matters to me lately. I do look forward to spending some quality time with my son on Saturday and Sunday. He stays with his Father during the week because of the school district and it drives me crazy. Since I can't get him to my area, it looks as if sooner or later, I will have to move back to that direction so I can have him with me all the time. He has been sending me super sweet text messages for the last two days, telling me how much he loves me and how much he cannot wait to move back in with me. I know until that day, I will never be whole. Luckily it is only 35 to 45 miles away, so I won't have to uproot anything at all. He is literally my world.

My little heartbeat, Austin. Almost 14 years old. My baby always. He is so strong and precious to me, words cannot describe my feelings for him.

Project 365

Well I missed yesterday here because I was literally in the bed all day being sick! So glad it doesn't hit me too often because it really brings me down. I am still blah today, but I am hoping after a long hot bath, I can get going again. So ready for things to change for the better around here. I am looking for work, AGAIN. It mentally drains me, and it takes alot to do that. I know the door will open for me, as long as I keep God in the center of all my problems. I trust Him in everything.

I posted my first short story 2 days ago to Thin Threads and it really pumped me up. I can summit several stories if I want, so I will be working on something today and tomorrow for a second entry. I know I have to keep working at this even when it gets depressing when I have no feed back. I read success stories all the time telling us about how hard and disappointing the beginning was for them. So, that is encouraging to me. I am stubborn in so many ways, and focusing that stubborness towards not giving up in the writing world will be a plus for me.
Not sure what's in the plans today. I seem to get going and then start feeling bad again, so I am a little fearful to go anywhere. I may just pull some books up online instead of heading to the bookstore for more materials on study.
I guess my main thing today, is to get to feeling better, make a few calls, and send out some emails I've been meaning to send. No matter how I feel, I can always make my words seem perfectly healthy! :)

Project 365 (day two)

Thanks to my sissy keeping me in line.. I have an hour and 7 minutes left of my day to get this in.
Just been one of those days for me I guess.. not one for the good day books. On top of a blah day, I am feeling achy in my back and my head. So many people I know are down with the flu or just plain out sick, so I am hoping I am not coming down with anything.
My evening on the other hand was pretty peaceful and nice. Had to finish some things up around the house and sat down to actually visit with the hubs for a few minutes, which never happens anymore, thanks to my new found love of writing. :)

I had a memory hit me yesterday, as the above picture shows. I found these cheese and crackers for my niece and thought about my sister. Our mom would buy these things for us, and you always knew which one was hers because she never ate the crackers!! She would just take the red "scooper" and eat up all the cheese. So needless to say, I never took my eyes off of mine because she would take my cheese too! In those days, if you ran out of cheese before your crackers, it was a BIG deal!! I really love that I have so many memories of childhood, but what I love more than anything is when the little things that you may have forgotten about comes back to you as an adult. That is something that will always make me smile and be thankful that I have such wonderful memories.

Project 365

Ok, I think this is a great idea. Reminds of the movie Julia and Julie. I thinks its great way to stay disciplined in one area of my life anyway! :) I think I will start today!

Today I am hanging with my niece Chloe. (babysitting) She is 2 years old and a wonderful little person to hang with! Thinking about doing this at least once a month because it destresses me from my everyday routine. I don't get a thing done because I give her all the attention. Not too keen on the kiddie channels on TV, but they are a great way for her to stay settled and alot of these shows are educational. We have been singing the ABC's while doing laundry and she dances while I sing them. She tends to want to stay by my side all day.. even as I type this. She is so sweet and reminds me alot of her momma ( my baby sister that I am a whole 13 years older than) when she was her age. She is so good for me and I totally enjoy her. She keeps me grounded for some reason. It also reminds me how demanding young children are.. wow! So glad I was young when mine was this little. We only have a couple of hours left before her parents will be home and then it's back to the real world for me. But I am very thankful I got this day to spend with her. :)

Monday = Funday

 I am struggling today with lots of stress financially in my life lately and it's really affecting my nerves. Just ready for this dry spell to get over with. I am not talking about low money in the bank for a month or so. It's been like this for months. I have to deal with a utility bill today that has already been kind enough to extend it til today and I still don't have the money until Friday and even then I really can't afford it. It's not JUST dealing with it, it's dealing with my husband, that is great in everyway, other than bills and no money. I just cannot wait to have my bank roll coming in at times where I know it will be there. I have been having trouble with work and not making as much as I know I am worth. Employers these days just don't pay like they used to. It's tough! As I am sure you all have felt in the last couple of years.

That is one of the reasons I want to get my book going and published as soon as possible. I know it's not going to make my world dramatically change at first and it's not a get rich quick solution at all. It's work, hard work. I just am not very patient at all. I just want something successful, I can call my own and take care of my family they all deserve to be taken care of.
I have been looking into freelance writing and have emailed a few places about it, but nothing in return yet. So I will keep on doing what I have been doing, and continue to write and blog and hope to run into someone or something that will lead me to my future. God is good, and He will direct me through it all.
In the meatime, I desire your support and your ideas and tips. I have so much I want to get involved in, but sometimes daily stress gets me down to where I don't see a light anymore. I request your prayers with my finances and direction in my life.

It's finally Friday!

For some reason, this week has dragged by. So glad the weekend is peeking around the corner at me. Don't have much planned for the weekend, but that's usually when they are the best. I have alot on my mind today with juggling decisions in my head. I want to play smart instead of 'just' play and I don't want it to bite me in the booty. So I'll make a move with the Lord holding my hand. He won't let me down. :)

I started my excercising yesterday, finally. I walked and jogged around the hood and then came home and did an 8 minute cardio. It was tough, but so glad I did it. Now to do it again until it's habit. I can already feel it in my legs and arms. My back felt broke when I woke up this morning, but once I started moving around, it got better. I have got to continue doing it, because this body is ridiculous and I should have kept it in shape better. That's ok though, I can do this! :)


I have a meeting today with a friend of mine I haven't seen in a while. I am sure it will be a nice time. Got my pool match tonight with my team and they are so pumped for this new session. I am so proud of them! It will be great to get out tonight and just unwind. (If there is such a thing).

My husband and I have been is such a bad financial slump lately and everytime it looks like things will turn around, something comes up and we are back to nothing. I know that one day, things will be better to where our lives doesn't revolve around money and we just live and work and do what we want to do. We aren't asking for much, just a little of something. That's why I want to use my God given talents and work hard on my book. I am not expecting that to be a life changing woohoo, but I believe that it will open doors to the dreams I have always had. To work hard at the things I love to do and not worry about the next dollar. One day... one day, I will run into that person or thing, that keeps the path straight for me and the doors open. God's got this.. and I am letting Him keep holding on to it. I can't and won't do it alone. :)

Becoming more disciplined with my time.

So I have set a schedule for each night of my week to do certain things and make sure they are getting done. My blogging and working on my book being my main concern. Monday nights, work on book. Tuesday nights, read and watch movie with family. Wednesday nights, blog and write. Thursday nights, do more writing on my book. Friday nights, out with hubby and friends for pool league. Saturday's are kid and family days, Sunday's, anything goes. I am slowly but surely trying to be more accountable to myself and my time. I have never been good at keeping a schedule and sometimes it bites me in the butt. So, instead of expecting things to change without changing certain things is out the door! I am the one in control of my destiny.. (other than God Himself) and if I want to be successful in something I love to do.. well, I guess I need to adjust some things in my life.

I went to the bookstore today to read on some things that is helping me with getting my book started. The call of the Writer's Craft by Tom Bird has amazing information. Everytime I go to Barnes and Noble, I grab that book along with my big journal and a hot cup of latte' and jot lots of things down that I research later. I also read that book online at night to do more reading. Call me old fashion but for some reason, I read better with a book in hand than I do reading books online or even on a Kindle. (although I still want one) There is just something about the smell and the feel of a "real" book. I have several things I found today that has really encouraged me and has settled my fears on getting my first book published. Here are a few chapter titles that I found that I am currently doing research on. One at a time.

      **The Larger World
      **A sense of enjoyment
      **Writing about places
      **People along the way
      **The uses of memory
      **An acedemic life
      **Books of the month
      **How to write a memoir
      ** Writing as a ministry
      **Recovering the past
      **Change is a tonic

I know that these topics may not mean anything to you, but to me it is the basics of a great book. Not only that it is a step up in my personal life to make me a smarter and more stable woman. I like that idea alot. :)

     One of the statements I read that really hit hard for some reason was a simple little thing.
COME TO DO AS WELL AS YOU CAN. wow! Love that! Puts alot of things in perspective for me as well as you, I am sure.

        

I finally got the subject line for my book!

I have tons of thoughts running through my mind 24/7 here lately. All I can think about is writing, reading about it, blogging and sharing topics with friends on facebook, talking to my sisters about it and even watching movies with writing as the topic. I cannot get enough of it. It shouldn't shock me since it's in my DNA to write and I've known for 8 years now that I'm destined to write. Just never have I really put it into practice as I have in the last few weeks. Each day the drive gets stronger to where I can't sleep without thoughts hitting me so hard, I have to get up to write them down. With all that said, I know I'll be writing a book this year but until tonight I couldn't narrow it down to what I want to write about... first anyway.
I knew it would come to me, just didn't know when or how. So much I want to write about but knew I had to start with one subject. It has even gotten to the point of craziness and it made it very hard to concentrate when so many ideas were coming at me. When people ask me what my book will be about, I couldn't give them an answer.. until now.
I laid down to go to sleep with my wonderful husband holding me, knowing my mind wasn't ready to shut off yet. I started praying. Thanking God for all He is in my life. Thanking Him for the doors opening and letting Him know how thankful I am that He loves me so much. I told God thank you for giving me the desire to write so many years ago. That when I sit down to do it, I actually feel complete. I then prayed for wisdom and direction. I told Him I had so many thoughts and ideas but didn't know where to start, or should I say, what subject to start with and stick to it until the end. I needed ONE project, ONE subject to stay on so my mind wouldn't go crazy and blow up! Sure I could always talk about my testimony of how God pulled me out of the death trap I had put myself into, but that wasn't the FIRST thing I wanted people to read. It will come, but not now. Besides, that's what everybody is expecting anyway, and I'm not ready for them to see that part... no not yet.
So as I prayed, I stopped long enough for the Lord to speak to me. Without hesitation He answered me. I dug deeper than just my mistakes that caused my life hurt. I dug all the way down to the core of everything that has always been hidden.. always been denied... and always has hurt the worse... My Daddy.
WOW! Just saying those two words scrambles my brain and my emotions, but this is one subject I know little yet alot about. I know this is a direction from God because it just 'feels' right. The right time, everything! It's time for complete healing for me, once and for all. No matter how many tears I cry through this, no matter how many times I have to walk away from the computer, I have to do this! With God I can! He doesn't leave you when He directs you and this is to all the Glory to Him. Every bit of it!

I'm writing a Book, and I want you in it..

Between now and the end of August, I’ll be giving you many ways to participate in the creation of the book. I want to use lots of examples to explain the strategies I’m advocating, so I’ll be asking you to share your stories with me. I’ll probably ask you to complete a few quick surveys to help me better understand your needs and questions — after all, if you are reading this blog, you are the target audience for the book too! I’ve wanted to write this book forever, and so many of you have inspired me to really make it happen, so I want to include as many of your stories as I can.

SO IT'S A NEW YEAR!!

So i spent the first NYE at home (without a party) and at first I was upset about it, cause I had so many invites out. But after I got comfortable and settled, I truly enjoyed it. I had my glass of wine and a movie waiting to watch the BALL drop in NYC. Today, I seen many post of people complaining about hangovers and broken hearts, so very glad i stayed in. Too many arrest for DWI's and stupid fights. All of it is overrated anyway, so no complaints here!
Today, I slept in and went to lunch with the ole hubby. Got the football games on in the background, but none of them are interesting today. Just made a fresh cup of coffee and now it's blogging and writing some thoughts down. Going to dinner with my sister and mom tonight. Got to have the cabbage cooked along with the black eyed peas. Not sure it has anything to do with a great year, but cant be too safe! I am very excited about this new year. I have alot of plans and projects to get done that will be life changing. Im turning 40 in March and with a new year and a new decade in front of me.. I'm ready for the future!